I’ve got to tell you guys, I’m exhausted. Moving, caring for an infant and being an internationally celebrated painter* is a lot for one girl to handle. Today alone, I rose with the sun**, cleaned the whole house***, enjoyed a healthful lunch****, played games with the baby designed to stimulate his brain while simultaneously teaching him French*****, ran a half marathon******, and then finished off the day with a hot, home cooked gourmet meal that I paired with an excellent wine*******.
I can see why you’re intimidated by me, I’m kind of an inspiration.
*lie. But when I was in fifth grade a work of “art” I submitted was featured in a sister-city exhibit at a children’s museum in Japan. It’s been all down hill from there. ** lie. It was the son. And he had been yelling for at least five minutes. ***lie. But I wrote the check to the housekeeper.
****lie. I had meatballs and fries with gravy at Ikea.
*****lie. We watched three episodes of Cupcake Wars. But Florian is French, so that part is true. Ish. ******lie. I walked to the mailbox. It’s a block away.
*******lie. I ate three Mega Stuf Oreos and washed it down with Diet Dr. Pepper.